Hello! I've been busy. Really what that means is I think I've drafted this newsletter like four separate times and every time I write it halfway and then I put it down and it becomes out of date and I have to pick it back up again and go oh god. Okay. Well. That's no longer what I'm currently thinking about. This is what happens when you skip writing a newsletter for a month, you just lose the plot entirely.
Things I'm Thinking About (In No Specific Order Of Importance)
Awesomesauce
Awesomesauce is a genre of fiction/popular culture, and it's when you can feel the author making writing decisions because they feel that "this shit is awesome" with minimal other explanation. I consider awesomesauceness to be a post-2010s post-ironic condition mostly indulged in by white guys who are like "What if normal shit... was radical?" What if explosions were sick. What if blowing stuff up was cool. What if the power of love rocked. What if this character was evil for no reason other than it looks cool and had no other meaningful deeper motivations.
Superman (2025) is awesomesauce. Avengers Endgame is awesomesauce. Spiderman: No Way Home is awesomesauce. MLP isn't awesomesauce but being a Brony definitely is. Ready Player One is awesomesauce. Not all of Doctor Who is awesomesauce, but "just this once, everyone lives" is.
Things that are awesomesauce are usually based on some combination of epicness, camp, and slop, although something can have those qualities WITHOUT being awesomesauce. Like, Tony Hawk's Pro Skater is epic but not awesomesauce. Awesomesauceness is specifically about the author's awareness of the concept of an audience and being like "guys isn't this awesome? Don't you agree? This is fucking awesome?"
SNL is awesomesauce. Powerscaling is awesomesauce. Isekai slop is awesomesauce. Toy Story 5 and other similar kinds of sequel nostalgiabait are also awesomesauce.
Awesomesauce is value neutral. Many things that are awesomesauce can be good... If the thing itself is actually awesome. If it falls flat, then well! The author looks silly and self-conscious. And also they say things that don't necessarily mean anything. But sometimes they do! :) But sometimes they also really don't.
Colonial Moomins
I've been making my way through the Moomin books slowly, and I've also been thinking about how Moomintroll is a coloniser. That guy just moved here and he thinks it's his valley now? And that he can chase people out of places? And the valley is named after his family? Much to think about here.
(There is also a lot of Gender going on in Moomin which makes me go like, oh boy. I am still going to read the rest of it. I want to have read all of the Moomin books which means I have to read the rest of it.)
Trans(feminine)-Negative Affect
I've been thinking about this a bunch because it just seems like a persistent theme in the transfem art/literature that I've been consuming lately. I watched the finale of The Amazing Digital Circus at the start of this month and I just keep thinking about it. I think it's more than just a broad transgender negative affect because the majority of it seems to pertain to transfeminine experiences specifically. And in particularly there's this trope that keeps recurring (awful/complicated channer trans woman) that I don't quite know how to make sense of either. So maybe something to think or write about at some point. [1]
Ace Attorney
I've developed a new blorbo and his name is Miles Edgeworth. He's going up on my shelf next to Qifrey Witch Hat. I'm thinking about him. I'm thinking about them (WrightWorth). They make me feel crazy.
I've been playing my way through the original AA trilogy these few weeks and I'm working through AA3 now! I have been advised by my evil vizier (read: my friend Iris who has been in these trenches for the past 13-14 years of our lives maybe) of the play order to follow so I will be doing that. Probably. Anyway I like them. What if you changed your career path so that you would see your crush again in court. What if you continually inspired each other to be true to your values instead of focusing on winning. What if you did this over and over again. I need a lobotomy.
My PhD Thesis
It's not real and it can't hurt me. I have plenty of reading and writing to get done!! BUT I passed my progression review which means that I get to move on to the next year of the PhD, and I also presented at the PGR conference earlier this month. :) I'm doing it. I'm getting a good grade in school, which is reasonable to want and possible to achieve.
Other Things
I've traipsed around the country these two months a bunch (went to Bath, and also to London a few times). I've been OUT and ABOUT and DOING THINGS. I saw a few stage shows (I caught the TGWDLM West End run! And Beetlejuice and My Neighbour Totoro, and The Play That Goes Wrong). It's been kind of busy mentally. I've been tutoring a lot as well. Did you know that when students have June holidays, I still have to teach them. It's fucked up.
I'm going to be going home to Singapore this weekend, which will be nice, because the UK heatwave is unpredictable and the Singaporean heat, while sweltering, is a lot MORE predictable. It's been up and down in Europe lately.
I made some comics recently!! Me and my friend Zack made them together :) We did a comics tournament (OCT, or original character tournament) and we got knocked out in round 1 but we had a REALLY good time. Here's our intro comic for our awful necromancer Sylas, and here's our round 1 comic against our friend Emm. And here is Emm's comic against us! Comics are fun I want to make more comics. A fish-themed OCT may be in my future.
Also last thing: it was literally my birthday yesterday (yay!!). Birthday :) It feels strange to be 27, if only because every time I have a birthday I think about when someone who was awful to me when I was younger was that age. And I look back now and I'm like. It's crazy that you were doing all of that to me. Like it's actually insane that you were Like That. What were you doing at age 27?? I don't know. Maybe I just have it more figured out, even when I don't, which is nice to know. Kind of! :)
See you next month!!
Notes
[1] The only transmasculine example I can really think of in this regard is What Happens Next by Max Graves? But I'm still thinking about it.